Here we go, the top 10 girls.
Katharine: “All in Love is Fair”. She rooms with the pick. They are silly & dumb. Well, if kat is silly that can only mean that The Pick is dumb. Is this the 2006 version of three’s company? Now all we need is Jack Tripper? Ryan? Oh wait, Ryan really is Gay. The blouse and pants makes her look 4 months pregnant. Not a flattering look at all. Vocally, she’s all over the board. After an outstanding week last week, this one is weak. Mom is not smiling. I bet she scolds Katharine the next time she speaks to her. Maybe even break out the wire hangers. Daddy McPhee is kind of hot. Cha Cha
Kinnik. “Here For The Party”. First thought that crosses my mind. She looks like Kinnik Sky Vodka, Drag Chanteuse and South Carolina’s entry in the Miss Drag queen of America pageant. Now all we need is Miss Vida Boheme, Miss Noxzema Jackson & Senorita Chi Chi Rodriquez to “sing” backup. High energy number but it doesn’t’ really showcase her vocals. Cha Cha
Lisa Tucker. “Who’s Lovin’ You”. She’s got good control for a young girl. Not my favorite song. This is not bad, but IMHO, a forgettable song. She has some bad notes but the end is strong. 2.5 Cha Cha’s.
Melissa. Bonnie Raitt’s “Why Haven’t I Heard From You” I think it’s more like “Why Can’t I Remember You?” Oh yeah, she’s the one with the smokey voice. Melissa sings much better this week than last week. The song suits her well. She even looks prettier this week although I still can’t remember her. In order to remember, I shall deem her Suzi Quatro. And maybe to be memorable all Melissa needs is a leather jumpsuit and that knee slap point thing that Leather Tuscedaro did in Happy Days. 2.5 Cha Cha’s
Heather Cox. Stalky is going to sing “Hero” by Mariah. Oh Gawd. Kill me now. I already give her no Cha Cha’s. She sings. She sucks. Horrible. Ok, since I was mean to her last week, I’ll give her half a Cha Cha.
Brenna. Frack. This is going from bad to worse. I don’t think I’ve disliked a contestant more than Ms Gethers. She’s gong to sing “Last Dance”. Shhhh…do you hear that? It’s the collective sound of America saying “I SURE THE FU*K HOPE THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE & LAST DANCE”. This is horrible. This is almost as bad as what’s his name’s version of “Copacabana” last week. Brenna’s basically posing & mugging her way through the song. She sticks what boobs she has out, thursts her ass out and pretty much mouths to the camera, “Call me, I’ll do ANYTHING. 1-976-SUCK”. She is so fake. No Cha Cha’s. No cha cha’s EVAH for Brenna.
Paris. Thank goodness, someone who can sing. Little Miss Paris sings “Wind Beneath My Wings”. Where does that deep voice come from? Not her best, but miles better than the previous two singers. For saving me from sticking two BBQ picks deep in my ears, I give Miss Paris a Cha Cha Cha.
Ayla. “I Want You To Need Me” Saline Celine. I like her with straight hair better than the curls. She looks like a pretty Sandra Bernhardt only without the lips and I don’t think she’s a lesbian. The head bob to create vibrato is a little annoying. But, the girl can sing. I would like to see her something other than a ballad next week. She’s tall, pretty but kind of bland. 2.5 Cha Cha
The Pick. “Something to Talk About”. This Backwoods Betty crap is getting old. She’s never had a spinach salad. She never heard of Calamari. I almost expected a sushi/raw fish comment. She’s got the sweet & innocent look down. The pick is pretty much a lock for the finals. Randy & Paula pimp her. Simon calls it like it is. She’s cute and it’s hard for people not to like her. The performance was ok and her vocals were average at best. Cha Cha.
Mandisa. “Cry”. Powerful vocals. Some notes were off, but she can power her way through a song. The performance was kind of boring and we’ve heard this song many times, but Big Mama can sing. Although her tongue kind of bugged me...it was a chalky/whitish color. Cha Cha Cha
Overall, it was a very weak night for the girls. No one really knocked the socks off of me like last week. And guess who’s standing right next to Ryan in the closing segment and remains in the front as the credit rolls. Such a media whore.
Mandisa
Paris
Ayla
Lisa
Leather Tuscadero
The Pick
Kat
Kinnik Skyy Vodka
HUGE DROP
HeaCox
Brenna
Tomorrow night, it's the boys. Bring on The Amazing Race. I am OUT of here.
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